His Potential
by Grey Like Stormy Skies
Summary: It’s almost scary, how easily he can get to me. Whenever he’s around I just see red, and I lose all selfcontrol. All I can think about is how I could ever possibly put him in his place. Companion to Something Special [JamesLily oneshot]


**_His Potential_**

James Potter—Head Boy, Quidditch Star, Prankster Extraordinaire. He also happens to be the most _confusing_ boy I've ever met, and it annoys the hell out of me. I wish it were still Fifth Year, when he was still undeniably, without a trace of doubt. an arrogant, bullying prick.

For years, he's been nearly unbearable. Always walking around with that overconfident smirk plastered on his face, as though the rest of us were beneath him, and not worthy of his presence. And, oh _God_, when he would ruffle his hair to make it look all windswept I'd want to walk over and rip it all off his head with my own hands. Not to mention his constant "Hey Evans, go out with me?". I don't think there are any other six words I hate more when said together than those.

It's almost scary, how easily he can get to me. Whenever he's around I just see red, and I lose all self-control; all I can ever think about is how to put him in his place. Only that never works, because the next day he'll just be strolling down the corridors again, with that stupid confident swagger and conceited grin.

I may be harsh, but it's just because _I don't get him_. He has so much potential, y'know? I mean, even I'll admit it, the boy's brilliant; loads smarter than me, and he barely ever studies. I study all the time. Actually, if I really thought about it, maybe that's the real reason I dislike him so much—he's everything I want to be, but for him, it's effortless.

And with all his potential, what does he do? He flies around on a broomstick all day, and plays jokes on other students. Could there be more of a waste? Sometimes I wish I could just suck all his talent from him and keep it for myself, because God knows I'd put it to good use. But I can't do that, so I'm stuck watching him act like a prick when he could be doing something wonderful.

Now though, now I just don't know. It's only the first day of Seventh Year, but already he seems…different. And why couldn't he just stay the way he was, hmm? I never felt bad at snapping at him before, but earlier, in the Prefect's compartment, it seemed as though he was actually hurt when I told him I'd rather work with Snape as Head Boy.

But that's not fair; he can't just start caring all of a sudden. He's always pursued me because I refuse to go out with him, never because he's actually _liked_ me, right? So it's not fair of him to start caring when I snap at him, because it's not like I care when he cheats on all his coursework with Sirius or cracks jokes about how I'm just the most _prefect, rule abiding stick in the mud _ever. Only…maybe I do care when he says that, so maybe I'm just a huge hypocrite.

But there's no way he could actually care about me, right? Because, yes, there's always been those times that he's jumped down Slytherins' throats for calling me, y'know, _that_, but that's just basic common _decency_, isn't it? Though I suppose if that's my reasoning, I've got to admit that the boy's at least halfway decent then, so maybe I've just trapped myself in a corner.

Only…it's weird, because I really do see such potential in him, and it's not just intellectual. It's only been lately that I noticed it, around last June, but he's so dedicated to his friends, y'know? Remus will look so sickly and tired so often, and it's like James bands the other two around him, to make sure he's okay. And I admire that.

So do I admire _him_? God, that's an odd thought. But maybe…maybe I admire his potential. His potential to be an amazing friend, and his potential to be able to truly make a difference. That's it, then. I don't admire the _boy_ at all, just all his qualities. So there. I'm not attached to Potter at all, so he can stop trying to change my mind about him.

Because, honestly, what was tonight all about? He just walked past me in the Great Hall, calm as anything, and smiled at me. Nothing else, just a smile. No smirks, no rude comments, no hair ruffling, no 'Hey Evans, go out with me?' It was just a smile, and I don't know why, but I couldn't help smiling back.

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A/N: You've taken the time to read this, I'd really love it if you took another minute to leave a review, telling me what you thought. Thanks! 


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